Panda (Porn)

Panda Lovin’ (Photo by Sam Knight)

The Giant Panda (Ailuropoda Melanoleuca) is a bear native to central-western and south-western China. Its distinctive black patches around its eyes are what coined the term ‘panda eyes’, for one’s dark eye rings, something us students have no problems in relating to.Despite the fact that pandas are carnivorous, the Giant Panda’s diet is 99% bamboo.

Pandas are notoriously reserved about sex, and repeated encouragements for them to mate (in captivity) have proved to be fertile futile. Giant Pandas have low to no sexual desires, especially so for those in captivity. In fact, more than 60% of adult male Giant Pandas in captivity lack any sexual desire, and only 10% of them are capable of natural mating, with only 30% of that latter producing ‘results’ (in the form of baby pandas of course). Giant Pandas reach sexual maturity between the ages of 4 and 8, and may be reproductive until they’re 20. Hence, when they’re around the age of 6, after a dash of inspiration from the people at the China Giant Panda Breeding and Research Centre in Wolong, the Pandas are shown a primetime movie to get their loins a’stirring – a video of 2 Giant Pandas mating. This’arouses the sexual instincts of giant pandas, enhances their natural mating ability, and raises their reproductive capacity’ – in other words, these films are, well, porn.

These films have proved to be successful, so far – after a long degree in how to impregnate a fellow panda, Ximeng in Wolong put his new found knowledge into good use and is now a father. Other Pandas who have been educated are also now showing signs of a higher libido and sexual desire.

This unorthodox method (in most cases, artificial insemination is used to impregnate various animals in captivity. For example, lions and polar bears in the Singapore Zoo) has proved to be successful thus far. After a long degree in how to impregnate a fellow panda, Ximeng in Wolong has put his new found knowledge to good use and is now a father.Other Pandas who have been educated this way are now also showing signs of a heightened libido and sexual desire. In 2006, it even sparked a baby boom of Pandas in Chang Mai, Thailand.

While for fellow human beings, where pornography is often frowned upon (for obvious reasons – being extremely disrespectful to the sexes and sometimes, even used as blackmail), Panda pornography has been effective in raising the productivity capability of these endangered species.

Go Pandas!


“Panda porn to cure bedtime blues”, 27 June 2002.

URL: (accessed on 5 April 2010)

“Porn sparks panda baby boom in China” by Denis D. Gray.  msnbc, 27 November 2006.

URL: (accessed on 5 April 2010)

“Giant Panda” by wikipedia.

URL: (accessed 0n 5 April 2010)

“Prim pandas probed by peeping satellites” by Sam Knight and agencies. Times online, 27 September 2005.

URL: (accessed on 5 April 2010)

“Transvestite” Cuttlefish

Ever heard of a non-human example of a “Transsexual”? The Australian giant male cuttlefish, Sepia apama, entices many with its superb mimicry skills to disguise as a female cuttlefish in order to increase its chance in mating with the female cuttlefish.

Dressing up as girls?

Source: BBC NEWS- Dressing up as girls?

But why? The ratio of male to female cuttlefishes is four to one, females reject almost 70% of mating attempts, this creates fierce competition among the males. Thus, smaller size males have very slim chances to mate with females when compared to the bigger and more dominant-like male (Hanlon et al., 2005).

How? The Alternate mating strategy- “Visual deception is achieved when small males suddenly hide their sexually dimorphic fourth arms, acquire the mottled skin patterning typical of females, and shape their arms to mimic the posture of egg-laying females, who are not receptive to mating” (Hanlon et al., 2005). As many large males will be busy combating other large males and would not take these “transvestite” cuttlefish as a threat, these smaller males then take the chance to move near the female and attempt to make with it.

Success rate? Studies have shown that these female mimickers were able to escape the larger males through deception and position near the female in 30 out of 62 attempts, some large males also tried to mate with the mimickers (Hanlon et al., 2005). When mating with females, some mimickers show male displays of banners and moving stripes while some remained as the disguised female. Returning large males, which were involved in conflicts, tried to aggressively separate the mating pair (mimicker and female) or ignore the pair when they spot them. Females therefore may be subsequently fertilized by both the large males and the mimickers (Norman et al., 1999).

Second source which supports the above:

Norman, M.D., Finn, J., & Tregenza. T. (1999). Female Impersonation as an Alternative Reproductive Strategy in Giant Cuttlefish. Biological Sciences, 266 (1426): 1347-1349.


Hanlon, R.T., Naud, M., Shaw, P.W., & Havenhand, J.N. (2005). Transient sexual mimicry leads to fertilization. Nature, 433: 212.

“Cuttlefish wimps ‘dress as girls,'” by unknown. BBC News, 19 Jan 2005. URL: (accessed on 6 April 2010).

“Mating trick,” by Sciencentral. Sciencentral YouTube Channel, 11 Feb 2009. URL: (accessed on 6 April 2010).