Co-author it with primary school children.

It’s actually quite an interesting study, but methinks the reviewers perhaps went easy on the eight year olds. There are more than two figures (expressly forbidden by the journal), spelling doesn’t seem to abide by the OED (e.g. “duh duh duuuuhhh”: duh is in, but not duuuuhhh), the introduction starts with “Once upon a time” despite there being no historical aspect to the work, and one author appears to be made up (a certain “P S Blackawton” whose affiliation is Blackawton Primary School). It reminds me of those letters to national newspapers by “Bobby, 7” and his friends.

The article has attracted quite a bit of attention in the press. More so than any of mine, so perhaps my words are tinged with jealousy…